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Ratman's a Hobo
Ratman's a Hobo
Last time I saw him he was snortin' up Ovaltine lines
And pissin' on dumpsters
Hadn't brushed his teeth for a month!{/chorus}
Sleepin' on posters for Mike Gravel /
Downin' anything that makes him feel well /
He was a student of Mineral Science not ten years ago /
Blowin' glass tumblin rocks and diving down deep OH SO LOW /
Well his girlfriend broke his heart /
And his car, it just ceased to start /
He lost his job as well /
And started carryin' a smell
-chorus-
He was snoozin' on crumples of Gravel '08 /
Talkin to anyone maked him feel like he was on a date /
He had a minor in Anthropology not ten years before /
Tell how everything changed with the French and Indian War /
Well his grades they started to drop /
And his mom, she was killed by a mop /
Landlord said she wanted him out /
And he became a beached rainbow trout
Ratman's a Hobo
Last time I saw him he was snortin' up Ovaltine lines
And pissin' on dumpsters
Handn't flossed his teeth for a year
Weed Wackin' Sunglasses
One fine summer day I was walking down the street
And I saw a young fellow standing next to me
I looked to the left and I looked to the right
And I crossed the street with a lotta delight
When I saw the shiny shades on the man in front of me
I took them off his face and I put them on me
I took them for a stroll, I took them for a spin
I took them for a ride in my little wagon
I looked over my shoulder and what did I see
The weed wackin' man runnin' after me
I took them out of the wagon and I tossed them in the air
He caught them with his face and spanked his derrier
The man put on his shades like a king puts on his crown
And he weed wacked till the sun went down
He said by the way my name is Joe
And he skipped away with the weed wacker in tow
